Hitting the wall

I didn’t think it would happen to me. After all, I’ve been writing for around fifteen years, I’ve “won” Nanowrimo eight times, I led/taught a writing group for two years, and I regularly give talks on “How to Write a Novel in 30 Days”. Heck, I published a book! I’ve got this writing thing down.

Um, yeah, no.

Not entirely sure what happened. I started some flash fiction stories back in July thinking that would be a simple, quick kick in the butt for getting some stories written. Come on— five stories running 500 words each. Piece of cake!

Um, yeah, no.

Each of those stories went longer than 500 words. Some a little longer (1400 and 1800 words), a couple longer than that (3000 and 3200 words), and then the Big Kahuna at 8200 words.

And I don’t think I was longwinded.

Then I went to Japan and that took me way off course between the planning, packing, and coordinating with friends over there. Had a great time (despite catching a monster head cold), and was looking forward to getting back into the swing of writing things. After all, November is National Novel Writing Month, or as I was thinking, “National Short Story Writing Month”. I’ve completed the Nanowrimo challenge enough to know that I can do it, so I set a goal of writing 30 stories in 30 days. It would be a stretch for me, but I read about other people who had done it and had amazing experiences. I wanted those experiences, too!

Well, I certainly got an experience. Just not the one I was expecting.

See, I hit a wall. A very big wall. The wall writers (usually the inexperienced or not-completely-dedicated) will bemoan. The dreaded Writer’s Block.

I thought it couldn’t happen to me. I was smarter than that, more dedicated than that. From everything I had seen, “Writer’s Block” was just an excuse people give for not being able to sit their ass down and write.

That’s true, but I think there may be something more behind it.

And that would be Fear.

Ah, yes. Hello, dear friend Fear. It has been awhile.

So I am working my way through this, and will share that process as I figure it out.*

Photo source: Gabriele Diwald

 

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*Really. If I can help others who are struggling with this, then it will have been worth it. Painful, but worth it.